To Paraphrase …

I did not go into this movie expecting it to blow my mind the way The Incredible Hulk and Iron Man did last year. After the serious level of Nerd Rage™ the first three X-Men movies caused in me, there was no way in Belasco’s brimstone covered He-demon parts I was going to let myself get psyched up to see this movie. There just wasn’t. My heart couldn’t take that level of disappointment again, especially when it came to my all-time favourite (if severely overused) comic book character.

What I did enjoy was the entire opening, all the way through the opening credits. Good interpretation of Origin (which was released from November 2001 to March 2002, and you can get collected in a nice hardcover), and of course Wolverine charging through every war from the American Civil War to the Vietnam War, all while chomping on a stoogie (which I HATE that the comic version doesn’t do anymore – it’s not like the smoking’s gonna kill him, Marvel!).

Some of the fight scenes were pretty fun and straight out of the comics, so of course I appreciated that. I even liked Liev Schreiber as Victor!  That was the biggest surprise I got from the movie.  To be fair, I have a thing for the mutton chops, so it possibly could have just been the facial hair working for me.  He was really good, and made Sabertooth more than just a snarling, grunting, blunt object and gave the character some depth.  Imagine that!  And, I’m not even going to lie, Hugh Jackman’s wife is a lucky broad.  Dude is so smoking hot in this movie, your underpants will spontaneously combust right there in the theater during the Weapon X scene.  Not even joking.  Plus, he is clearly the best thing about this entire movie.  He’s one of those actors who is just good at what he does, no matter how horrible the material is.

That being said, I seriously disliked how they mashed up mutant names with mutant abilities and character continuities that don’t go together in the source material.  HORRIBLE.  I swear they swapped Nord’s abilities for Domino’s, I don’t even know what abilities Beak was supposed to have, and Emma FROST being Silverfox’s little sister?  What the shit?!  Don’t even get me going on what happens with Deadpool. Oh.Em.Gee.  And when the shit did Gambit get the ability to defy gravity? Besides that (and him not having a Cajun accent), that kid they got to play Remy wasn’t half bad. He had the attitude down pretty solid, and I bought him as Gambit. Why there had to be explanation of the “code” names is beyond me.

Sometimes, the claws look really fake and that’s too bad.  I still want to get a pair of gloves with the claws on them (and not the ones they have for sale at the local Target for $20 for a single clawed glove).

Before the credits start, there’s a “reveal” that I about flipped over.  It has to do with a character that I love that did show up in the other X-Men movies.  It was short, kind of had a weird painted background thing going on, but the sentimental part of me for this character totally peed a little in her pants.  Don’t bother staying until after the credits are over; that bit of nonsense was a worthless tease that had the potential to be WAY MORE frakking awesome than it turned out to be.

If you want to watch Wolverine in some great on-going adventures, I suggest watching the cartoon Wolverine and the X-Men which just finished season 1 here in the States not too long ago.  You can get the first few episodes on iTunes or streaming from Marvel, along with the original X-Men cartoon from the 90’s (my personal favourite). But if you’re like my mom (who just LOVES the first three movies), you’ll totally dig this one too.